Review by LL Soares
I missed this one when it was in theaters, but, like another crime film from 2018, BAD TIMES AT THE EL ROYALE, I was eagerly looking forward to seeing this one on streaming. And it’s another case of a movie I wish I’d seen on the big screen.
It’s the near future, and Los Angeles has become engulfed in violent riots. The core of all the unrest is water. There isn’t enough to go around, and only the rich have free access to it. Armed police stalk the streets, ready to take on protestors. The city is pretty much a war zone.
In the middle of all this is the Hotel Artemis. Think of it like the Continental in the JOHN WICK movies, a place where criminals can go for sanctuary, and where violence against each other is against the rules. Except where the Continental offers lush rooms and safety, the Hotel Artemis is really a hospital for bad guys and fugitives to get healed when there’s nowhere else they can turn.
The Artemis is run by a woman simply known as The Nurse (Jodie Foster, the iconic actress who’s also in TAXI DRIVER, 1976, THE SILENCE OF THE LAMBS, 1991, and so much more), with the help of her right-hand man, the intimidating orderly Everest (Dave Bautista, who plays Drax in the GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY movies). That’s it for hospital staff. The rest is up to machines, including some 3D printers.
When people show up at the Artemis, they aren’t called by their names. They use nicknames, based on the rooms they’re staying in. So when two brothers show up, one is called Waikiki (Sterling K. Brown, of the TV show THIS IS US) and Honolulu (Brian Tyree Henry, “Paper Boi” from ATLANTA). They’re coming from a bank robbery gone bad, and Honolulu is seriously injured by a gunshot wound. He needs a new liver. Luckily, Waikiki has payed up his dues, and they’re allowed into the Hotel Artemis. Immediately, the Nurse gets Honolulu on an operating table and uses his DNA, and a 3D printer, to start making him a new liver. In the meantime, he’s in critical condition and can’t be moved.
But they’re not the only “guests” this night. There’s also Nice (Sofia Boutella of THE MUMMY, 2017, ATOMIC BLONDE, 2017, and Gasper Noe’s CLIMAX, 2018), a hitwoman recovering from an injury, and an arms dealer called Acapulco (Charlie Day of HORRIBLE BOSSES, 2011, and the great TV comedy IT’S ALWAYS SUNNY IN PHILADELPHIA), who’s on the verge of leaving. He’s even called a helicopter to come pick him up.
There’s some tension between the loudmouth Acapulco and Nice, and then Waikiki shows up, at first defending Nice, then realizing he doesn’t really need to. She can take care of herself. But this sort of minor tension gets ratcheted up tenfold when a new guest arrives at the hospital, the crime kingpin of L.A., known as the Wolf, but once he gets to the Artemis, they call him Niagra (Jeff Goldblum, also in THE FLY, 1986, the first JURASSIC PARK, 1993, and INDEPENDENCE DAY, 1996, ).
There’s also an injured cop named Morgan (Jenny Slate, of OBVIOUS CHILD, 2014, GIFTED, 2017, and recently in VENOM, 2018, as well as tons of TV shows), who is found outside the Artemis and who the Nurse demands be brought inside, even though it’s against the rules. Everest hesitates, but in the end, he does whatever the Nurse tells him to do. Morgan has ties to the Nurse’s life before she ran this place, but she’s taking a risk in helping her. Police officers are strictly off limits here, and are not even supposed to know that the Artemis exists.
Niagra, by the way, is accompanied by his hotheaded son, Crosby (Zachary Quinto, of HEROES, 2006-2010, Spock in the recent STAR TREK movies, and most recently as Charlie Manx in the AMC series NOS4A2), who makes a lot of demands, but who is not allowed past the front gate. He also has a bunch of gun-toting thugs with him. Crosby, whose whole existence seems to dedicated to “pleasing Daddy,” makes it clear that if his father doesn’t live through the night, things are going to get very uncomfortable for the Nurse. And he’s a real threat, because Niagra is the owner of the Hotel Artemis, and should anything happen to him, his son will take over. Both of them are violent men, but Niagra is at least reasonable.
There you have the set-up. The rest is about how these characters interact, and there are lots of twists and turns along the way, including double-crosses and murder attempts. All while the Nurse tries to save lives, with the help of her hulking assistant.
HOTEL ARTEMIS was written and directed by Drew Pearce. It’s his first feature film as a director, after directing several shorts and music videos. Before this movie, he was best known as one of the writers of IRON MAN 3 (2013) and MISSION IMPOSSIBLE: ROGUE NATION (2015). He was also one of the writers of the upcoming FAST AND FURIOUS spinoff, HOBBS & SHAW, coming to theaters this August. I’m not a big fan of IRON MAN 3, but I think HOTEL ARTEMIS is really good, with its emphasis on interesting characters, and it moves at a steady pace. It’s also a welcome relief from movie franchises involving superheroes or action stars.
Jodie Foster, of course, is the heart of the movie, and she’s terrific here. Looking old and tired, she is determined to be a beacon in the storm for these mostly sleazy customers. Her helping Morgan also shows that she has a human side, something she may have tried to distance herself from. Dave Bautista, who is one of my favorite things about the GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY movies, is also perfectly cast as Everest. He’s not given enough to do, but he’s enjoyable every time he’s on screen.
The rest of the cast is also solid. Boutella, Brown, and Henry have all been popping up in a lot of movies lately, and this one lets them show how reliable they are as actors. Well, maybe not so much for Brian Tyree Henry, who isn’t given much to do beside lay on the hospital bed and complain. Quinto (who is currently Charlie Manx on the AMC series NOS4A2) is also well cast. Goldblum (his identity was kept as a surprise when the movie first came out; I figure enough time has gone by so that this is no longer a spoiler) is great at playing sleazy dudes who demand your attention when they enter a room.
I really enjoy this one and recommend it to anyone who hasn’t seen it, and was thinking of checking it out. I give HOTEL ARTEMIS three and a half knives.
© Copyright 2019 by LL Soares
LL Soares gives HOTEL ARTEMIS ~~ 3 ½ knives